On the heels of two great sessions, last night and tonight, I'm suddenly feeling really down. It's like that Normal-High-Pain cycle they taught us about in school when cautioning us against drugs and alcohol. I think maybe I'm starting to outgrow this kind of roleplay... focusing on all the messy and kinky stuff. Maybe what I want is just to be understood and accepted. But I think it's time once again to take a break, and work things out on my own.
Yes I love to wear diapers, for whatever reasons besides the fact that they feel so good. Yes I love to suck on a pacifier... I think I have a bit of an oral fixation. I also chew pens and my fingernails. Yes I love pink, babyish, girlish things... though I'm really only a "sissy" because a) I think diapers look so weird and wrong on grown guys, and b) I think my love of diapers is tied to my softer, so-called feminine side. That's really why I visualize myself as a girl when I wear diapers.
Anyway, I've had so many wonderful experiences at Phoneamommy and I want to thank the many wonderful ladies here who have played with me, who understand this fetish and all its aspects. I'm not sure what to do next... but for now I have to take a break from Phoneamommy. Might be for longer this time, maybe even indefinitely... I just don't know.
If this is to be good-bye, know that JJ - my name's JJ, not Pink - thanks and appreciates all of you wonderful ladies for everything you've done for me.
May the one who causes peace to reign in the high heavens let peace descend upon us... and all the world.
I feel sad, and think I need a break.
I feel sad, and think I need a break.
Yes, I love diapers. Accept it.
-
mommy rebecca
- Posts: 148
- Joined: Mon Dec 11, 2006 10:53 pm
We will miss you JJ best of luck with everything! Accepting yourself first is most important, once you do that others will also and if they dont then they have their own issues to deal with! Love you lil one!
Mommy Rebecca
“You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.”Emo Philips
“You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.”Emo Philips
-
Little Stinky Britches
- Posts: 585
- Joined: Sat Jan 26, 2008 1:08 pm
- Location: In Diapers
I completly understand your feelings, and at times have shared them. Let me tell you what I have learned after living with these feelings for 52 years.
First, they NEVER, EVER go away. At times they are strong, at times they are weak, but they are ALWAYS there, sometimes playing in the background like an old famular song.
Second, these feelings are almost primal in nature. Wearing diapers and being loved by our mommies was the "first love" of our young lives. When adults are in fear for their lives, they will often suck their thumbs and cry for their mothers (and mess their pants) . Why? Because that was the safest place we have ever known.
I first felt these feelings when I was around 6 years old. I was playing at a friend's house, when his baby sister (around 13 months-old) stopped what she was doing, and turned red in the face and pooped her pants in front of everyone in the room.
I will never forget seeing her mother smile this motherly smile when she turned red in the face, and then I watched her mother gently pull open the back her her rubber pants and look inside her diaper.
"Why is she doing that?" I wondered.
After all, it was VERY obvious that this baby girl was "busy" doing something in her pants. But her mom wanter to SEE and SMELL the poop that was filling her duaghter's diaper.
The girl's mother called it, "confirming her suspicions."
I remember the infant was clenching her little fists, and grunting as hard as she could as her mother peeked into the back of her baby pants.
Her motherly smile, the wrinkled-up nose, the playfull "shooo-wee", all confirmed that, yes, her daughter was indeed "filling her pants" (as my mom liked to call it.) it was then I knew, at the age of 6, that I wanted to go back in time and be a baby, wearing diapers and rubber pants, and "fill my britches" for my pretty mommy.
These feelings have NEVER left me.
There is no "cure", no "fix", for these feelings, only comfort and understanding that we get from all the wonderful mommies that are here on Phone-A-Mommy.
Good luck my friend, you will always be welcome here and find comfort for your feelings.
First, they NEVER, EVER go away. At times they are strong, at times they are weak, but they are ALWAYS there, sometimes playing in the background like an old famular song.
Second, these feelings are almost primal in nature. Wearing diapers and being loved by our mommies was the "first love" of our young lives. When adults are in fear for their lives, they will often suck their thumbs and cry for their mothers (and mess their pants) . Why? Because that was the safest place we have ever known.
I first felt these feelings when I was around 6 years old. I was playing at a friend's house, when his baby sister (around 13 months-old) stopped what she was doing, and turned red in the face and pooped her pants in front of everyone in the room.
I will never forget seeing her mother smile this motherly smile when she turned red in the face, and then I watched her mother gently pull open the back her her rubber pants and look inside her diaper.
"Why is she doing that?" I wondered.
After all, it was VERY obvious that this baby girl was "busy" doing something in her pants. But her mom wanter to SEE and SMELL the poop that was filling her duaghter's diaper.
The girl's mother called it, "confirming her suspicions."
I remember the infant was clenching her little fists, and grunting as hard as she could as her mother peeked into the back of her baby pants.
Her motherly smile, the wrinkled-up nose, the playfull "shooo-wee", all confirmed that, yes, her daughter was indeed "filling her pants" (as my mom liked to call it.) it was then I knew, at the age of 6, that I wanted to go back in time and be a baby, wearing diapers and rubber pants, and "fill my britches" for my pretty mommy.
These feelings have NEVER left me.
There is no "cure", no "fix", for these feelings, only comfort and understanding that we get from all the wonderful mommies that are here on Phone-A-Mommy.
Good luck my friend, you will always be welcome here and find comfort for your feelings.
Phew! Somebody needs a changing.
-
SweetMommyCandy
- Posts: 171
- Joined: Mon Oct 19, 2009 12:06 am
- Contact:
-
MommieSara
Well said Mommy Candy, us Mommies are always here! That is what is so wonderful, it is always nice to know you can always come home!
Also very insightful as usual Marty! It is a shame that the small non harmful pleasures in life can cause such internal conflict when faced with the conditioning of the real world.
Also very insightful as usual Marty! It is a shame that the small non harmful pleasures in life can cause such internal conflict when faced with the conditioning of the real world.
I think I understand
I've been in you "space" before on several occasions. I understand.
Take your time, and work with time to figure it all out. I wish you well on your new journey. I have a feeling from experience that you will come through this for the better. Sometimes you do have to step back and take a look at life. Which ever direction you decide, so be it. Just remember to be true to yourself. I can't emphasize being true to yourself enough. Weigh your issues carefully, and you will be the better in any decision. Not just about this, but life in general.
All the best to you,
pinkluvs
Take your time, and work with time to figure it all out. I wish you well on your new journey. I have a feeling from experience that you will come through this for the better. Sometimes you do have to step back and take a look at life. Which ever direction you decide, so be it. Just remember to be true to yourself. I can't emphasize being true to yourself enough. Weigh your issues carefully, and you will be the better in any decision. Not just about this, but life in general.
All the best to you,
pinkluvs
We can change the world...even if it's just one diaper at a time!
-
Little Stinky Britches
- Posts: 585
- Joined: Sat Jan 26, 2008 1:08 pm
- Location: In Diapers
Yes, well said Mommy Candy! 
And Mommy Sara, thank you so much for your kind words, your thoughts are VERY insightful, and you always give me something to think about in your posts.
Yes, our fantasies, and especially MY fantasies are "non-harmful."
But I will go a step further....
Not only are they non-harmfull, but they are healthy, and help make me a whole person; giving me something I long for that makes me feel that all is right in the world again.
As a human being, we all poop, and our poop is offensive and shamefull to us and other people. (That is how we are socialilized.)
But as a diapered infant or toddler, in the care of a loving mommy, she is not offended by the smell and mess in our pants; far from it. She is delighted, and gives us love and acceptance for this natural, human function, that when we become adults, is "shameful" and offensive.
And Mommy Sara, thank you so much for your kind words, your thoughts are VERY insightful, and you always give me something to think about in your posts.
Yes, our fantasies, and especially MY fantasies are "non-harmful."
But I will go a step further....
Not only are they non-harmfull, but they are healthy, and help make me a whole person; giving me something I long for that makes me feel that all is right in the world again.
As a human being, we all poop, and our poop is offensive and shamefull to us and other people. (That is how we are socialilized.)
But as a diapered infant or toddler, in the care of a loving mommy, she is not offended by the smell and mess in our pants; far from it. She is delighted, and gives us love and acceptance for this natural, human function, that when we become adults, is "shameful" and offensive.
Phew! Somebody needs a changing.
-
MommyLizabeth
- Posts: 34
- Joined: Sun Mar 07, 2010 3:56 pm
-
StepSisterMandy
- Mommy
- Posts: 108
- Joined: Thu May 31, 2007 4:24 pm
- Contact:
I think we only got to play once but you were a lot of fun and you will be missed! hey and btw I found your wrestling it is on HULU so you can ditch cable!!!!
Mandy
Tattletale : motivated by selfish reasons, seeking attention, she may sadistically enjoy the punishment or embarrassment of others, or “telling” may be a convenient way of getting rid of obstacles.
Tattletale : motivated by selfish reasons, seeking attention, she may sadistically enjoy the punishment or embarrassment of others, or “telling” may be a convenient way of getting rid of obstacles.