We here at KPAM are deeply saddened and sorry to report that one of America’s favorite Iconic figures died today. Witness say the victim was taken by surprise as he stepped into the grocery store to purchase some Dixie Cups. One Witness stated ..”You know, he had it coming, crashing though walls like he did, making stains on rugs and clothes wily nilly, but it’s still sad to see him, sprawled out like that, leaking ice cubes.” If you are squimish or are easily upset we ask that you advert your eyes, the following image is disturbing.
It is true, he was very bosterous and loud with his signature phrase, “OH, YEAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!” Still, he did not deserve this. One perp has been taken into custody, they were found running down a side street with the tell tail sign of Cherry Kool-Aid splattered all over their clothing. Police have indicated that the alleged perp has maintained their innocence saying they were at a picnic and were simply running home to change clothing when a container of juice was accidently spilled on their clothing. The clothing will be sent to the state lab for testing to see if the substance on the shirt and shorts matches the Victim.
Now onto weather and sports.
With a Tear in My eye from the Local Police Station,